The greatest (and funniest) packing list for going to a dog show

The countdown has begun. There’s less than a week to go before the Bernese Mountain Dog Club of America National Specialty in Frankenmuth, Mich.

But the packing has been ongoing for weeks.

It’s a skill I perfected traveling the world alone as a USA TODAY staff photographer.

Now I travel with Bernese Mountain Dogs (Teddy, 3 1/2 years old, and Ziva, 6 months), instead of cases of photo gear.

A list-maker to top all list-makers

I’m a serial list maker, especially when packing. I have so many lists. I have lists of my lists.

But it appears I’ve been outdone in the list-making department.

Maria Crifasi, who is getting ready to leave for her 12th National Specialty, has the best packing list of all – and it’s hysterical.

Maria, a Berner owner since 1999, has graciously allowed me to share her list with you.

So I’ve ditched my list for hers. Enjoy!

Maria Crifasi’s Packing List
for the BMDCA National

• your dog/s
• WINE
• Crate
• crate dolly
• crate fan
• cool pad for crate
• cool coat for dog (hot weather)
• regular crate pad
• x-pen with ground cover
• reflective blanket & clips
• dog toys
• WINE
• bitch pants for the girls in season
• rolls of paper towels
• vanilla extract (for nose of sex-crazed male dogs)
• WINE
• frozen water – provides air-conditioning and cool water to drink – from home in case Berner may be sensitive to different water
• cooler with ice and drinks/food for you (fruit, crackers, snacks, drinks)
• bowls for food and water
• ample dog food, supplements, medication PLUS a few days extra
• can opener and spoon for canned dog food
• WINE
• MORE WINE
• first aid kit (for dog and for human)
• tissues for human
• lint brush
• extra collar and leash
• show collar and leash – obedience collar
• WINE
• auto harness
• license tag, ID, health certificates, proof of vaccinations (one vet insists on not only tags but receipts), microchip number.
• treats & special bait for the ring
• the Premium List and your tickets!
• road maps
• WINE
• camera – charger! computer + charger, Ipad + charger (you get the idea).
• grooming supplies: comb, brush, nail clippers, shampoo, towels, scissors, cut stop, mist bottle, dryer, grooming table, ear cleaner, cotton balls, Q-tips, eye drops, dental supplies, no-rinse shampoo (for muddy feet)
• carpet/upholstery cleaner
• recent photograph and a written description including name, breed, height, weight, coloring, distinctive markings, your vet’s phone number for emergency contact, microchip number; tattoo number. This info will make an instant flyer
• folding chair or seat cushion if there are bleachers
• sheet or blanket for hotel bed so that your Berner doesn’t get the bedspread dirty
• sunscreen and sun hat for human. Optional for Berner + other fun dog wear
• WINE
• clothes lint brush
• umbrella? raincoat? boots? gloves? CHECK WEATHER!
• Breath mints to camouflage flood of terror-induced adrenalin in show ring
• WINE
• poop bags (easier than trying to find the public shovel) & flashlight for night
• hand wipes (in case you bought cheap poop bags)
• LOTS of money for the vendors
• cell phone so you can tell your friends about your wins and phone CHARGER

And last but not least: A corkscrew AND WINE glass charms!